"They" won't eat us...

Discussion in 'The Corral' started by Tbitt, Apr 1, 2013.

  1. Tbitt

    Tbitt Most beloved member of MW

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    "They" won't eat us...

    http://www.habitatforhorses.org/human-dna-found-in-horse-feed/


    [size=14pt]Human DNA found in horse feed [/size]

    Denver (AP) Test have reveal human DNA in a shipment of 15,000 pounds of horse feed delivered to Sabbatical Breeding Farms in Denver, Colorado. Local law enforcement has asked the FBI to step in to assist in the investigation.

    "At this point, we have no idea where the contamination occurred," stated Lt. John Wheatly of the Colorado State Police. "It's evident that somewhere along the line, illegal activity is involved."

    Brian Norquest, manager of Sabbatical farms, said the first indication of trouble came when the horses refused to eat the new grain. Sabbatical Farms is a nationally known breeding facility of grade horses. "These horses need to be kept as healthy as possible because of all the procreating they do. When a procreating horse doesn't eat, there has to be an issue with the grain." Norquest said he immediately sent samples of the grain to the lab for analysis.

    Tungsten Labs director Earl Simwell was the first to find the human DNA and contacted Norquest with the result. Simwell said that while the human component was just over one percent, it completely threw the flavor off. "There's nothing wrong with human meat," he added. "It just doesn't mix well with oats."

    Todd Axelrod of the Colorado State Depart of Veterinarians disagreed. "Throughout their lifetime, humans are injected with all sorts of drugs. I certainly wouldn't want my horse to eat that stuff."

    The Regional FBI office in Ft. Collins said they received the request for assistance and are looking into sending an investigator. Arnold Pecking, Chief Agent, stated that due to the sequester and subsequent budget cuts, the FBI is only investigating major crimes. "Minor crimes like murder and food supply contamination will simply have to wait," he added. Pecking suggested that the BLM be contacted. "This sounds like an act committed by some wild horses."
     
  2. Powdernsmoke

    Powdernsmoke New Member

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    I am utterly amazed at the amount of people on FB who do not realize that this is humorous. Do they not remember what day it is?
     

  3. Tbitt

    Tbitt Most beloved member of MW

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    Doesn't matter if this is real or not.

    This shit is funny!


    Love:

    "It just doesn't mix well with oats "
     
  4. cartpony

    cartpony New Member

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    truth. my favorite was " the flavor was thrown off"
     
  5. Bronson

    Bronson New Member

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    Lol, funny stuff.

    April Fools aside, it would not expect more herbavores to be too keen on eating a food product containing meat.
     
  6. photofinish

    photofinish Senior Member

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    Sabbatical Farms is a nationally known breeding facility of grade horses.

    This was my favorite line :laugh:

    Umm, don't be too sure about that! I've known quite a few horses who were plenty fond of cheeseburgers, lunchmeat sandwiches, and breakfast burritos (bacon, or ham or sausage) ;)
     
  7. Powdernsmoke

    Powdernsmoke New Member

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    HAH! My first pony would snag anything related to meat. Burgers, lunch meat, hot dogs, but her absolute favorite was chicken salad sandwiches.
     
  8. reininlane

    reininlane New Member

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    We had one that loved Micky D's burgers, but would spit the pickles out!
     
  9. equusteacher

    equusteacher New Member

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    Yup!
    I knew a gelding that probably would have walked through a flaming hoop to get to a cheeseburger! Pickles and all! :laugh:
     
  10. Mstar

    Mstar New Member

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    Re: "They" won't eat us...

    My grandpa's horse allegedly loved burgers too, but they could only have mustard on them and nothing else or he wouldn't eat it.
     
  11. Azadestana

    Azadestana New Member

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    Don't humans taste like chicken?

    "Hi! I'm Crazy Eddie! I put babies on spikes. Do you want a rack of babies? We've got babies on racks! Mmm, they taste of chicken!" They do! Babies taste of chicken! Cannibals say that human flesh tastes of chicken, so babies must taste of chicken. And chicken tastes of humans. ( nervous laughter from audience ) Good, I'm glad you're coming with me on that." Eddie Izzard - Dressed to Kill